10. You coordinate your daily attire to match the phone's case.
9. You have to constantly GPS yourself to find out where you are.
8. On official holidays you allow it a little rest and some alone time on the couch.
7. While allowing your phone a little rest and some alone time on the couch during official holidays, you break out in cold sweats, close the doors and blinds and hope that nothing of any importance happens anywhere in the world - or at least no one posts a picture of their pet in bunny ears acting cute.
6. You have to constantly GPS yourself to find out what you are supposed to be doing.
5. Before you begin a face-to-face conversation with someone you use the phone's camera to perform a retina scan on the person, cross-referencing that information with your contacts list and verifying their identity before you speak to them.
4. You make sure the phone is closer to you than your fork when sitting down for a meal.
3. When someone asks you how you are doing, you check your Feelings/Moods/Current Disposition App before answering.
2. You refer to your phone as, "Sparky".
1. You are reading this post on your smart phone.
10. Catcher takes his position behind home plate wearing his helmet brim-forward.
9. First baseman warms up in the on-deck circle with a Wiffle Ball Bat.
8. Absolutely no one on the roster the Yankees are interested in buying out.
7. Half of the front office staff come to work hoping to have a chance to drive the Zamboni between periods.
6. Center fielder always puts eyeblack into his eyes (and blames that for his poor fielding percentage).
5. When the announcer calls out a 6-4-3 he is actually giving the paid attendance for that night’s game.
4. Bobble-head night giveaway is always of the opposing team’s mascot.
3. Pitching staff ace is actually the pitching staff ace from last year’s team.
2. Fans throw foul balls back onto the field.
1. Spring Training Motto: “There’s always next year!”
What This Is
Top Ten lists are compact, succinct, simple and exactly ten items in length (most of the time).