Top Ten Signs The Opponent Your College Football Team Is Playing Is Not An Equal Adversary

10.  Has the word, "Institute" in their school name
9.   Before the game, their marching band members are recruited to play on the offensive line
8.   Have no bus to travel in, only a really well-organized carpool
7.   The head coach cannot figure out which end of his headset to speak in to
6.   Left over scholarship spots filled in by tackling dummies
5.   Team name appears on jumbo-tron scoreboard as, "Visitor"
4.   When they break the huddle - pulled hamstrings
3.   Think they are making a road trip to compete in a chess tournament
2.   Have to shorten the game to only three quarters
1.   Are on the schedule next season, too